The policeman walked out, oh so proud on his beat
When a vision came to him of stripes on his sleeve
"Promotion," he whispered "I'll try for today
So come with me Mr. Ri-tooral-I-ay"

"Come tell me your name" says the limb of the law
To the little fat man selling wares on the straw
"What's that sir? Me name sir? Why, 'tis there on display
And it's Moses Ri-tooral-I-ooral-I-ay"

The trial it came on and it lasted a week
One judge said 'twas German another 'twas Greek
"Prove you're Irish" said the policeman "and beyond it say nay"
And we'll sit on it Moses Ri-tooral-I-ay"

The prisoner stepped up there as stiff as a crutch
"Are you Irish or English or German or Dutch?"
"I'm a Jew sir, I'm a Jew sir, that came over to stay
And my name it is Moses Ri-tooral-I-ay"

"We're two of a kind" said the judge to the Jew
You're a cousin of Briscoe and I am one too
This numbskull has blundered and for it will pay"
"Wisha, that's right" says Moses Ri-tooral-I-Ay

There's a garbage collector who works down our street
Who once was a policeman, the pride of his beat
And he moans all the night and he groans all the day
Singing "Moses Ri-tooral-I-ooral-I-ay"